No Escape

I felt so down from everything, being numb don't last long. Even the computer wouldn't get my mind off things. So I picked up my ukulele, and lay down on my bed to play while stoning. And when I closed my eyes for a moment, 2 hours flew by. I woke up realizing I had been cuddling my ukulele asleep. It sure wasn't as soft as Mr.Teddy, but it still was something I could cling on to.
The world is a cold place, a place I'll never understand. I feel out of this world, no one seems to be able to see what I see. Out of force and overflowed suffering, I tried to make myself numb to pain, ignoring it just like how I see the world does it. I knew it won't last for long, but I was left with no choice. And so the day that all the ice I've froze around my heart got broken down, sooner than I thought it would happen.

There's no more escape, reality is here. I need something, that I can cling on to. Like how I hug my baby pillow to sleep every night, that touch of assurance. I know I have it, but I yearn more than just words. I believe that actions speak louder than words, I know things can be better. That's my wish.

But yet again if whatever situation I am put through would be glorifying to you, it is my will too.